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5 Places To Have Sex

Sex is a part of everyone’s life. Alright, let’s be honest, sex is a great part of everyone’s life. I don’t think there is one person in this world who doesn’t love making love. If you happen to find someone who doesn’t, then they are more than likely a cyborg from the future sent back in time to kill someone important, which means you’re safe.

The bedroom is the standard place, as well as anywhere in a house really; the shower, on the counter, your dad’s favorite chair and against the hallway wall to list a few. If you really want to have a more interesting sex life you have to be adventurous. Doing it in other places along with the fear of being caught, can make sex more exciting. Here are five places to do it.    

1. Boss’ Office – Whether you like your boss or not I’m sure you wouldn’t mind finding a way to give them a big “fuck you” even if it is without their knowledge. Any office will do I’m sure but there is something about it being the office of the person who could fire your ass anytime they want to, it just adds that little extra thrill. Offices generally have a desk and a chair, which are probably the two most used pieces of furniture after a bed. Some may have a filing cabinet which can be hard to work with but still doable, if you have the knowledge.

2. Hospital Waiting Room – This one is tricky. Waiting rooms are generally filled with other people. It is possible to have sex in a room with other people and not have them realize what’s going on. You have to be very discreet and quiet so if one of you is a screamer or heavy moaner, this probably isn’t a good idea. Sometimes, when you’re in the hospital at 3 in the morning because your friend has alcohol poisoning, the waiting room is empty. In which case, if the area is separate from the reception desk, then go for it. Sure you’re concerned for your friend; the sex is just something to take your mind off of your concern.   

3. The Confessional – Gasp! I know, who would ever suggest such a thing? This guy right here. I’m not an atheist or a Catholic, so that didn’t have any influence on my decision. I am actually a Deist; someone who believes God created everything and just left us to our own devices. I don’t put down anyone who believes differently than me because we’ll never know who is right until we die and when that happens it won’t matter who was right and who was wrong. Still, churches and the Christian faith just seem to be so against sex, especially casual sex. If you were to have casual sex, considered a sin, in the Confessional, where people go to confess their sins, well that would just be ironic, wouldn’t it? Imagine if a priest was in the other side, ready to hear of your sins? Do you think he’d forgive you for the sin your committing on the other side of him? My guess is probably not.  

4. Ferris Wheel – If you’re not big on the whole people watching you have sex thing, this one will have to be a quickie. Even if you do manage to be the car stopped at the very top, you won’t be there for long. The rocking of the passenger car will not only terrify you, as you contemplate whether the car will tip over and send you falling to the ground, it will also add more motion into the actual act of having sex. The spike in adrenaline as you fear for your life and the added motion should make it a better sexual experience.

 5. Bungee Jumping – Don’t ask me exactly how this would work, as I have no idea. I imagine it’s a lot like having sex standing up, except you’re free falling a few hundred feet. Then you’re flying back into the air only to start free falling again. You repeat the process a few times until you just kind of hang there for a bit until they bring you back up. I don’t even know if you’d have the time or the range of motion to actually do anything. And seriously for a guy having your P in her V while bungee jumping should scare you because I feel like, well you might break your baby-maker when you snap back up or something. Still, it is worth a try. And would be very, very epic.


6 responses

  1. Brian C

    If there are two humans on this earth who have ever completed number five they should have a street named after them in every town across America. The simple physics simply would not work, although it’s a nice addition to the list.

    March 10, 2011 at 12:04 am

  2. Ha, as I read your blog, I found myself thinking about all the places that should have been great places to have sex, but weren’t. Ick!

    March 10, 2011 at 5:03 am

  3. Donna Steiner

    Well, you probably win Most Dangerous Blog, but I’m not sure that’s a compliment.

    March 10, 2011 at 1:20 pm

  4. Justin Neuman

    I don’t know where you come up with ideas for these lists, but they are great. Doin’ the dirty in your boss’s office is ballsy and anyone who pulls it off deserves a medal. But it would have to be during the work day so there’s still a chance to get caught. Doing it after work when everyone else is gone would be a cop out. Nice post.

    March 10, 2011 at 4:27 pm

  5. kitirish

    A confessional, really? … I think they would burn where they stood. A ferris wheel would be pretty G, but I bet you someone would fall out.

    March 10, 2011 at 5:15 pm

  6. While bungee jumping? Oh wow. That would probably be an incredibly painful experience if it were even possible. I thought about skydiving…I think that would be interesting. Great post.

    March 10, 2011 at 5:51 pm

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